Slithering Newz

An Idaho home, ironically located in the Upper Snake River Valley, is infested with snakes. And that has the new owners singing Billy Joel’s Movin’ Out. Hundreds of snakes have been found under the floor boards and in the walls.

When interviewed by Lois Lane, Samuel L. Jackson said, “The family called me before they called the exterminators over at Terminix. And you can bet your sweet ass that I’m gonna get those mutha fuckin’ snakes, out that mutha fuckin’ house.”

The Newz At 4:20

The Scripps Research Institute in California has discovered that the THC found in marijuana can prevent Alzheimer's disease.

When interviewed by Lois Lane, Mr. Wendell Johnson, a 90-year-old resident at Happy Acres Nursing Centers, said, “With my Viagra and my dope, now I’ll be able to remember all the hos I hit.”